Dolls High Seed in Regionals

If you are a Colorado sports fan you know that the Rox are leading the Wild Card race in the NL, the Denver Broncos are sitting atop the AFC West at 3-0 and the Rapids control their own playoff destiny, but did you know our very

Shotgun Betties vs Slamazons

own Denver Roller Dolls Mile High Club is ranked #2 in the West Region by the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA)?  Next weekend the Roller Dolls will host the Western Regional Roller Derby Tournament (Derby on the Rocks) at the Bladium, which is the last of four regional tournaments where teams can earn a spot in the finals in Philadelphia the weekend of November 13-15 to crown a national champion.  If you aren’t familiar with the 21st century version of roller derby, it has the atmosphere of a Mammoth game, timing aspects of soccer, shot clocks as in basketball, line changes similar to hockey, and the quick scorign and contact of arena football.  No fake WWE throwdowns here – these girls hit concrete when they land!

If you haven’t been to a match you should go check it out.  The sport has evolved over the last five years here in Denver, and I’ve seen a big jump in skill level, game knowledge, strategy and overall talent.  There are three home teams in Denver (Bad Apples, Green Barrettes, and Shotgun Betties) along with the All-Star travel team Mile High Club.  During the season they compete against each other along with Colorado teams from outside Denver metro and across the country.  The Roller Dolls season runs from March to November, and each player pays ($40/month) for the opportunity to get the crap knocked out of her while circling a flat track on the old-fashioned four-wheel skates.  Players must tryout then be chosen to particpate in the one month training camp called the Dollhouse, after successful completion they are eligible to be drafted by one of the regular teams.  If a player isn’t drafted she can continue to improve her skills at practices and test up into the A or travel teams anytime during the season. 

Green Barrettes vs Bad Apples

These players must show they can do more than skate backwards to “Let It Whip”, they are put through a set of drills including cone sprints, jumps, falls and hitting skills.  Yes, there is a strategy to falling.  The league currently has about 100 active players who practice four days per week for a couple of hours each session.  The Dolls work on agility, endurance, derby skills and core body strengthening.  Many were speed skaters or hockey players in their younger years, but anyone with a competitive spirit and desire to smash into someone can tryout.

There is one local match remaining (Oct. 24) in the season between the Bad Apples and Shotgun Betties to crown the Dolls league champion coupled with a men’s bout.  The early match-up pitted the Denver Shotgun Betties against the Pikes Peak Slamazons up from the Springs.  The visitors were overmatched, but the wispy and agile Clitty Clitty Bang! Bang! did her best to put points on the board for the ‘Zons.  Too many good jammers (those are the speedsters and only member of the team that can score) on the Betties, and the marked difference in strategic maneuvers and skill level made this match lopsided in favor of the home team.  The final score was 185-39. 

The second game of the double header had two Denver teams face off with the Bad Apples taking on the Green Barrettes.  It was a close match in the early going, but the Apples had a good lead on the Barrettes by halftime.  It looked like it was going to turn into another blowout until the Barrettes

Green Barrettes vs. Bad Apples

made a late run to close the gap.  With a little over three minutes left to play the Barrettes had the lead jammer (the only player that can score points in a jam) and were positioned to potentially grab enough points to take the lead, but Coach Joe Mamma called off the jam (only the lead jammer can do that prior to the two minutes expiring in a jam).  I’m guessing he thought he could get a better match-up in the next jam, but Fonda Payne lapped the pack like they were in an 80′s roller rink and racked up 20+ points before the two minutes mercifully expired.  Fonda Payne had been racking up points for the Apples all night, but she was knifing through the opponents blockers like they were hot butter in that late pivotal jam.  The Green Barrettes made a final push in the last two minutes, but couldn’t overcome Fonda Payne and her Bad Apples for a final score of 141-133. 

The Roller Dolls play their regular season games at the Denver Coliseum (family friendly venue) and the Filmore (16 years of age and over only) where PBR, nachos and pretzles are standard fare.  The Western Regionals will be played at the Bladium on October 2-4, and either one day or three day passes to the event are available.  You will be impressed by the athleticism and strategy of today’s roller derby and I encourage you to go support our local Dolls this weekend.